Ask Uncle Robbie

I AM A 20-YEAR-OLD GAY MALE. I've been out since I was 15, but I don't go around with a "fag flag" nailed to my chest and I'm not attracted to guys who are femme. Most guys who are “straight-acting” are actually straight. I've found guys in their 30s who are gay and “straight-acting,” so why can't I meet someone in his 20s who's the same?
-- Helpless & Hopeless

Dear Helpless,

Remember, not everyone has had the time you’ve had to come to grips with who they really are. Uncle Robbie remembers his 20s as if they were yesterday (no smirking). Fresh out of the closet and looking for direction, your dear Uncle experimented with many different forms of expression, including both “butch” and “femme” behavior before settling down again. Without knowing where you’ve encountered these little flamers, Uncle Robbie can’t make alternative suggestions, but instead of decrying the scarcity of butch 20-somethings, why don’t you consider dating those butch 30-somethings you seem to be surrounded by? It may not be as bad as you think.

=Uncle Robbie

Have a burning sensation? Ask your doctor. Have a burning question? Ask Uncle Robbie.